Amatonormativity from the perspective of someone who has no desire for romance or sex

I had my eye on this movie for a while and was super happy to find out that this was shown at a Japanese film festival (where the title for this movie was 'I Am What I Am' and completely sold out!). So of course I went to see it and I ended up loving it. So here's my review.

In order to give a good review I must first explain 3 words that some people might be familiar with, but may be new to a lot of you.

1. Amatonormativity: the widespread assumption that everyone is better off in an exclusive, romantic, long-term coupled relationship, and that everyone is seeking such a relationship. - a term coined by Elizabeth Brake.
2. Asexuality (also, ace): a label for a sexual orientation that describes people who experience little to no sexual attraction.
3. Aromantic (also, aro): a label for a romantic orientation that describes people who expeirence little to no romantic attraction.

This is a movie that - at its core - is about amatonormativity. It shows how it can harm anyone, but particularly those who are aro and/or ace. The Kasumi, main character of this movie, is aromantic and asexual (aroace) and values her friends and family. However, it seems like everyone around her is more focused on romance and tries to push that on her.

What the movie does really well is showing how people may have very different reactions when coming into contact with someone who is aroace and genuinely does not have any desire for sex or a romantic relationship.
As someone who is aroace, I appreciated that they never made Kasumi doubt her identity. Throughout the movie it is very clear that she knows that she is aroace, that she is happy with who she is (it's just that she wishes other people would accept her for who she is as well).

I reccomend this movie to everyone.
To those who are not aro and/or ace themselves, I recommend it because it can be an eye opener to see how focused society is on romance. It is not always a bad thing, but it is good to be aware of it, especially if you or someone close to you maybe is not interested in romance for now, or ever. To know that without romance, someone can live a life just as fulfilling and happy.
& To aro and/or ace people, I reccomend it because - even if your life has been very different from Kasumi- it is likely that you'll watch some of these scenes and relate to it on a personal level because something similar has happened to you. I teared up at some moments because I have been in (almost exactly) the same situation as some scenes. Watching it on the big screen, it was both painful, frustrating and like a relief because it felt like being seen and recognised.
It is wonderful that this movie further spreads awareness of asexuality and aromanticism.

Leia Mais

Cozy slice of life drama with beautiful friendships and wonderful aromantic representation

I absolutely loved watching this drama. It is so cozy to watch, even with the occasional tension when the characters are going through difficult times.

What I really liked is how this drama dismantels stereotypical ideas of what a romantic relationship should look like and how its often presumed that one will prioritize a romantic relationship over a platonic one. This drama shows how the main (and side) characters feel uncomfortabe by these ideas and how they communicate with each other to live in a way that is comfortable for them.

I love the way one character is aromantic and the other is not, and that the character who is aromantic brings it up multiple times at moments where it makes a lot of sense for her to mention it. Sometimes to explain why she doesn't understand something, other times to give advice based on what she sees from a more neutral perspective on romance.

I highly recommend this drama if you want to watch something that feels like a hug, whilst also making you think about how you yourself might choose to live your life regardless of what stereotypes say you as a man/woman/person should want.

Leia Mais

This is how you do aromantic and asexual representation

I absolutely am in awe of this drama. There are barely any characters in movies and series who are aromantic and/or asexual, and those that do exist aren't always that great, or only get a few minutes of screentime.

This show is the complete opposite. It's whole focus is on the discovery of aromanticism and asexuality, and how an aroace (short for aromantic and asexual) can navigate a world in which people assume that everyone will end up falling in love and have sex.

The show has found a good balance between explaining enough about asexuality and aromanticism so people who have never heard of it understand what it is, without making it feel like the whole show is just a long class of learning about aroace people. The way each episode focuses on another part of how aroaceness intersects with a world full of allo people (people who are not aroace), makes it easy to follow and watch. I think they also made sure the show had a great balance of negative/sad vs positive/happy emotions.

I would recommend this show to everyone who is either aspec themselves, but also to anyone who is not aromantic or asexual. I recommend it to anyone who would like to open their minds to a different perspective on how people can live their life, and experience things in different ways.

Leia Mais

Don't go into this series thinking it's going to be all serious, cause it's not. It has a heavy focus on comedy and uses sound effects to assist with that.
I found myself laughing a lot while watching this. Sometimes the acting seems a bit over the top, but it fits with the whole style and feeling of the series so it is not out of place.

The plot was nice and kept me entertained. It had a lot of fun twists and turns. And what I really loved to see is that the friendship storyline was treated as just as important as the romantic storyline. I would watch it again just for some of those friendships and all the fun things they got upto.

One thing I disliked was is the soundtrack. Although there are some really nice songs, they were quite repetetive and it didn't feel like they were always placed well. Another thing is that there were quite a lot of remarks being made about one of the characters being fat. So if that's something that would bother you a lot, it may be a reason to stop watching.

Leia Mais

Do you want to believe in magic?

This was very enjoyable to watch. (I'll add some content warnings for this show at the end of my review)
What I enjoyed
The visuals were very beautiful. The entire show, all the sets and the cgi were very well done. It sure brought the magic in the show. The songs were quite beautiful, both in meaning and the sound of the voices singing. It was also great how this story had such a strong focus on poverty, the powerlessness you can feel when you're young and are very dependent on the adults around you for everything.
I also appreciate that they didn't use the overused and annoying trope of putting the main character in a romantic relationship and being 'boom, you feel all better now!'. That in fact, this drama doesn't focus on romance at all, instead it focuses more on a friendship where the magician is almost like a teacher or even guardian to the main character which was beautiful to watch develop.

What could have been better in my opinion:
For me, the songs didn't always come at the time where they were needed. There were a few points at which I expected a song and it didn't happen, and also a few where a song was that I felt was not needed for the characters/setting at that point (not that i minded that much, the songs were always nice).
One thing to keep in mind when starting this drama is that, although there are moments of magical beauty and happiness, overall the mood of the show is quite sad and depressing. If you want to watch something simple and easy, save this for a moment where you can handle heavy emotions. I wish they had a few less scenes where the main character was crying (at some points it felt like that was almost all she did for like half an episode).

Content warnings (this may be incomplete as I didn't keep track of them whilst watching)
- Attempt at suicide
- Off screen death of animal
- Assault and attempt at rape of a minor (twice)
- Violence and blood
- Murder
- Child neglect
- Parent once hitting their child

Leia Mais

The relationships (both the platonic and romantic ones) are what made me love this drama

Pretty enjoyable show to watch! The actors are great, both the actors for the main characters, and the supporting cast. At some point halfway through the show, I wasn't sure if I would continue watching as it got a little too focussed on court politics without interesting adventures or fights. But as I kept watching, I'm happy I finished it, because the story, but moreover, the relationships between characters, got interesting for me again.

One of the best things about this show is the build up of relationships, both the romantic and platonic ones.
The development of the romance between the main characters was really good and fun in my opinion. Their relationship was built up beautifully and very believable. You could understand why they cared for each other and why they fell in love.

Another relationship I very much loved was the friendship with Xuan Lu's character: Feng Qiwu.
Feng Qiwu on its own is a very interesting and wonderful character.
[SPOILER WARNING FOR THE NEXT BIT]
But I admire the show so much for not making her end up in a hopeless love triangle, instead having her become super good friends with Bai Fengxi (to the point that I would actually have loved an alternate ending of Bai Fengxi being in a relationship with both Hei Fengxi and Feng Qiwu). This beautiful platonic relationship is something I love to see, and often miss in other shows. It definitely makes Who Rules The World stand out from other shows that are otherwise very similar in worldbuilding and overall storyline.

Leia Mais