Why Do Women Love BL? Discuss Your Reasons

Giuca,  There is a definite stigma to being a fujoshi in Asia.  Consider that the word "fujoshi" means "rotten girl."   Now, we reclaimed the word and  use it as a neutral label that simply  identifies us as group, and happily use it amongst ourselves. However, outside of the group Asians still regard girls who are into BL as "rotten girls."  I read that they see fujoshis as unmarriagable because they are too into gay men.  They also see them as somehow perverted for adoring what the larger society still views as sexually abnormal.  

This is why the girl in that movie was so secretive about being a fujoshi.  But I'm sure you also noticed that when she "came out" with that big speech at the end, she was not pilloried by her classmates.  Indeed, she was far more accepted than she ever expected.  And the gay character in that movie also ended up being accepted (but only after being abused by a couple of asshole homophobes -- well, really only one asshole).  

I think this movie was portraying how the attitudes of the young in Asia are far more accepting than the older generations.   In fact, I have seen studies and stats proving how much more the under-30 people in Asia accept homosexuality.  So they are coming along, which is great.

I thought it was totally obvious that Hira was the seme - I'm surprised anyone would think otherwise. But then in the Eclipse, a majority thought Khaotun was the seme when I thought it was blindingly obvious that First was. But because Khaotun's character was more "in-your-face", it was inconceivable to many people that he could be the uke.

I'm super excited about Only Friends, which is paring Mark Pakin (Gemini's best friend in My School President) with Neo, two of my favorites - but I'm curious to see if they'll maintain the uke-seme thing because it's not at all clear who would be what.

That's what I loved about Addicted, and why I'm not really into Stay With Me, which I find dull. They turned the Bai Luo Yin character into a standard-issue uke, which robbed the story of one of its best elements. Can you imagine him just standing there watching watching helplessly while Gu Hai was fighting 6 people by himself?  That they were equal was underscored by BLY carrying Gu Hai to bed bridal style and Gu Hai totally fine with bottoming if that's what BLY wanted. He didn't want.

@CursedXistence 

Many men like Ohm because he has a smokin' body and gay men tend to like muscles.  I think we're largely indifferent to height. In fact, I love short men - the shorter the better.  Short, muscular men.

I hated Enchante and found it unwatchable, but I loved Boss & Babe. It wasn't better written or acted - so why? It's because Force spent a year in the gym and is now so hot it burns just to look at him.

@jpny01 

Yeah eye candy does make even a bad show a little more bearable to watch, all though in my case if there's an actor in a series that even gives a glimmer of their potential (even if they're terrible in the current show) I tend to stick with it as well. Come to think of it, I do end up tending to being drawn to shorter guys as well, which is weird because it's never anything I ever actively sought out.

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Back to the main topic, I think a big part of the appeal of BL series for me is that I tend to like the ones that are more slice of life, being LGTBQ doesn't matter to anyone, etc. types more than anything, but of course also like the self discovery ones as well. I think that's one of the reasons why "180 Degree Longitude Passes Through Us" ended up being my fav series so far. Wang couldn't accept why being LGTBQ was something to be afraid of others knowing, why it mattered to other people. A lot of the BL series I tend to like are like that, were being LGBTQ is something shown as being normal and nothing big to be celebrated because it's only a small part of who we are. Then again maybe that's just the 80's kid in me where the hope was it would end up being seen as something normal, where pride wasn't a necessity anymore and eventually disappeared instead of the loud and proud aka obnoxious shove it down people's throats in the most ridiculous ways possible until they are forced to accept it type of thing that goes on now. Very few American / western series / movie portray it like that, it's always so big huge declaration to the world, etc. etc. instead of a "Yeah I'm gay, so what, what's for lunch?" that a lot of the bl series do.

 Maggi64:

Lol, "Yeah, I'm gay, so what, what's for lunch?"  

I  feel the same way.   I find one of the pleasures of Asian BL's is that they are free of heavy politicizing or polemics.  As opposed to an American LGBT  movie where the characters come marching down 5th Avenue shouting, "We're here, we're queer, get used to it!"   

Asian BL' either portray being gay as no big deal, or portray the struggle of a character uncertain of his sexuality in a private, personal context rather than a larger social, political context as the Western LGBT gay stories do. 

A perfect example of this is the original USA "Queer AS Folk" and the remake they did a couple of years ago.

 I agree that there was a time when gay people had to fight for visibility, acceptance and pride and that this had to be a fight in the political realm as gay people were asking for civil rights.   I just meant that it will be cool when gay people are regarded as so normal and so naturally part of our society that it would not be necessary to politicize it anymore. Asian BL's often portray the gay character's friends and family casually accepting homosexuality as no big deal (eg the recent "Love Tractor"). This is rather ironic because Asia is more homophobic than the West.   

Nevertheless, this attitude of casual acceptance is appealing to viewers such as myself, and why I prefer Asian BL's to the LGBT content in the West.   I also prefer Asian BL's because even the shows that honestly portray the  homophobia there do so in a different manner.  For instance, the Asian BL will portray the struggle of a character who is being mistreated by homophobes as something experienced in a private, personal context rather than a larger socio-political context as Western LGBT movies portray it.  

Some good examples are Asian BL's like "Where Your Eyes Linger" and "Cherry Blossoms After Winter" that portrayed a homophobic parent, and thus portrayed the struggle in a personal context.  Compare those shows to  American LGBT movies such as "Philadelphia"  and "Milk."  Both "Milk" and  "Philadelphia"  were about fighting larger social forces and, thus, portrayed the characters in a political context.  Of course, it's necessary to fight the larger social forces.   I agree about that.  I just think that stories centered on the smaller, personal level have more authentic emotions.  I suppose it really comes down to a matter of taste.  I simply have a greater taste for stories told in the personal realm.

That's an excellent point about the difference between the concept of "love is love" and the "gender does not matter" concept. This notion of gender not mattering is why we get so much of that "I'm not gay, just gay for you."   In other words, the character will say that they don't like men but that this one particular man is so special that they can convert to gay for him and only him, because "gender does not matter" in this particular case. 

I call it the "One Penis On the Planet Plot."   It's a dangerous concept because, as you said it allows for the notion of conversion  therapy.   In fact, I had said that exact same thing a month ago on post where I expressed annoyance at the One Penis On the Planet Plot.  So you and I think very much alike!

 jpny01:

It also creates the impression that if you're gay and love a straight guy enough, and pursue him relentlessly, he will fall in love with you too. Rather than beat you to death, which is far more likely.

That's not actually much of a problem, since it's non-applicable to women and I imagine almost all gay men would know better than to do that. But it could still cause issues if some fujoshi is pushing it. A straight guy might have a strong negative reaction if people are talking about the idea of his being with another man.

LOL, that's so true about a straight  man being more likely to beat you death than fall in love with you.  The girls who think that a straight man can fall in love with  One Penis On The Planet do not fully appreciate how different our bodies are.  

A straight man is accustomed to holding soft, pliant flesh that is hairless on the legs and face, and that has soft mounds in the chest area.  Touching this is what arouses him.   He is not going to suddenly get aroused by the feeling of a hard, muscular body that has hair on the legs and a bearded area that makes the face rough, as well as having a hard chest rather than soft mounds.   People who believe in the "Only Gay For You" concept focus on the men being emotionally attracted to another man, and forget that for a real relationship to happen there must be a physical attraction too. 

The only time I believe that an erstwhile straight man is going to get jiggy with a gay guy is if he was actually bisexual his whole life but in denial.  This is less likely to happen in the West because it's easier to come out.  In Asia, however, I can see a bisexual man being in denial for fear of homophobia.  Thus, whenever I see an erstwhile straight man get jiggy with a gay man in a BL I take the liberty of regarding him as bisexual even if the show never said so. This is a lot easier to do if the show does not portray the erstwhile straight guy as having a girlfriend.  

I hate when a BL shoves a girlfriend in our face. It makes it far less believable that the guy is bi. I believed that Nazue in Old Fashioned Cupcake was bisexual because in the manga it says that he has not been with a woman for 15 years.  He had 2-3 relationships with women that all fizzled out, and then decided it was easier to be alone.   Clearly, he is not that attracted to women.  This makes it easier for  me to interpret him as bi.  Then Togawa shows up and he's super gay (the manga never identifies his sexual past so the reader is at liberty to imagine it any way they want and I imagined him as gay his whole life).  Togawa brings out the hidden bisexuality that Nozue has denied his whole life.   

Now, I took a lot of liberties with my imagination here, but the point is that the show allowed for it. If the show, however, shoves a girlfriend in our faces to nail home that the guy is straight, it does not allow for it.  It's ironic that many BL writers go out of their way to portray a guy as being straight so they can use the One Penis On The Planet Plot when, in fact, it makes their story less believable.