Or, How to Rob the Cradle in 7 Gourmet Meals

Ingredients:

For the series:
10-15 year age-gap
6-10 inch height gap
2-4 side characters with no depth or individuality
1 small kitchen
1 knife and 1 pair of ryouribashi (cooking chopsticks)
1 serving (at least) of onigiri
1 serving (at least) of a Western dessert
2-4 instances (at least) of misunderstanding & miscommunication, or forced separation
1 episode of illness or indisposition
1 wet towel to help tend to that indisposition
(Story optional)

For each episode:
10 mins. of food porn, of which
2 mins. for broth-based dishes
2 mins. for rice-based dishes
2 mins. for curry or sauce
2 min. for lingering shots of chopping
1 min. for serving
1 min. for presentation
2 min. (at most) of interaction with side characters
1 exclamation (at least) of "oishii" or "umai"
(Plot and character development optional)

For serving:
2-4 shots of chopstick choreography per episode
3-5 near-kisses per series
1 fish-eye or camera-angle non-kiss per series (optional)
(Payoff optional)

Preparation:
1. Toss the ingredients together in a medium-sized series
2. Be careful to keep the right proportions for each episode
3. Simmer slowly to break down all chemistry and tension
4. Gently stir the camera around the top of the pan and apply suitable filters
5. Decant the bland broth into 25-minute containers
6. Garnish with the non-kiss
7. Serve lukewarm immediately, or tomorrow, or five years from now. It doesn’t matter.

Special Notes for Mitsuya Sensei:
1. I have not seen two actors/characters with less chemistry and less suited for each other since Elon Musk and Grimes. It is the first BL, ever, in which I actively did not want the men to kiss.
2. Yamazaki Masayoshi is an amazing actor, and made the role of Mitsuya his own.
3. Caramel Popcorn is the new birthday cake.
4. The dog was the best thing about the show. Fight me.

Note: This review also appears under Sugar Dog Life, but with a different set of notes.

DO SAY: Itadakimasu.
DON’T SAY: Ittakimasu.

See Also: Sugar Dog Life, Bokura no Shokutaku, Kinou Nani Tabeta, Perfect Propose.