I'm back from IdolFactory's ever-confusing two week break, trying to remember what the experience of this story was, and think my final answer is: it's fine. In comparison to GAP, I think Dream GL does a better job of crafting meaningful conflict and motivations... but that's about all the improvement I can give IdolFactory here. The actors are charming with good chemistry, but stilted by fumbled pacing that drags. The story is complex and mature, but the magic of the dream world is fairly scarce which diminishes the girls bond. Production quality is about equal to GAP, with perhaps some more interesting cinematography to match the dreamy setting (as opposed to an office romance). I didn't hate watching this, but IdolFactory will have to make some changes if they want to continue to stand out.

-The Full Review-
STORY:
For the positives, I genuinely enjoyed the story of Kim and Wan and their families. I liked how their relationship to their father's complicated their way to falling in love without relying on (as egregious of) miscommunication tropes. Their bond with their school friends was quite cute and brought a very lively energy to an otherwise sad story. While I really could use a break from lesbian-bride Heng, I don't think the marriage plot was awful... though the resolution was fairly melodramatic and rushed.
Unfortunately, the rest of the story was all over the place. So much time is invested into the acting competition plot-line, only to dissolve without fanfare. Likewise the couple-pair plot creates a huge mess before melting away into nothing. The mother's illness overlapped oddly, denying each of them a true moment to shine and bogging down the second half of the show with too much trauma... and so on. It badly needed another edit to restructure the story for this episode count/timeline.
Additionally, I think IdolFactory has gotten a little carried away with their episode lengths. The extra runtime allowed for frequent slow-mo and dead air as well as so many scenes of people traveling places (with no real reason to include the trip). Cutting back to a true 45 or 1 hour runtime would vastly improve the drag on some of these episode and force the screenwriters to cut some of their darlings.

ACTING:
I've seen some pretty harsh commentary, but I didn't find the acting all that grating. Fay, rather held back by the poor pacing of her character arc, did quite well once Dawan was allowed to grow and show all the sides of her character. I enjoyed the stubborn ferocity of her character and the more playful side that only Kim gets to see. I think she did well navigating the realities of depression, especially for a character who has been navigating these struggles for quite some time.
May, likewise, delivered a very competent performance. Her character was quite subdued, held back by the frustrations of so many things in her life going wrong, and I think she portrayed that exhaustion quite well. While some of the crying scenes were not the most natural, she truly started to shine while navigating Marwin, her mother's illness, and Dawan's tempestuous nature. I really enjoy her as an actress and look forward to seeing her grow.
I wish the female ensemble would have... swapped. I loved Frung, Pear, and Ploy and would have loved to see more of them. They're characters were charming and brought out interesting new sides of the leads. I found Looknam and Songjet.... quite overwhelming. I enjoyed their characters, but wish the director would have pulled them back more often. The friendships were very, very sweet but rarely allowed to develop any kind of emotion.

PRODUCTION:
In general, I think Marvellous Dream was a pretty standard IdolFactory production. Competent production choices informing a quality product with very few technical glitches. Like most IdolFactory shows, the OST was pretty limited and repetitive (I really wish the would expand their music), but the lighting was quite beautiful. Unfortunately, with a fashion-plot show, I have to say the costumes kind of... fell apart. While the actual clothing was quite quirky and enjoyable, Kim's designs were completely heinous. I wish the costumes had taken more of an opportunity to be informed by the story, rather than feeling like a child's Lisa Frank Fashion Design game.

INTIMACY:
I genuinely applaud IdolFactory for continuing to insist on allowing women to be sexual in shows. That said, some of the choreography here was... pretty awkward. I don't quite think we're there yet. Obviously, as they post to YouTube, there is no intention of any upper nudity. But the shots over backs and strategic pillow/blanket placement was not always the most natural. I think this director needs to study some GL to get new ideas on how to keep everyone covered while still delivering a good performance. That said, Fay and May did a wonderful job bringing chemistry and believable passion to the scenes! I hope to see this pair again soon, hopefully with better writing!

In all, I don't think Chao Planoy is for me, nor adaptations of her work. While I enjoyed my time with Marvellous Dream... I started watching several better GLs in the two-week break. I could be convinced to watch it again, but I probably won't do so on my own. Baby steps... baby steps... we're getting there...