My head hurts, my eyes hurts and my heart hurts

By the way it's 3:54am and i just finished the series (like literally a few minutes ago), so apologies if i seem a little touchy. Mysterious Lotus Casebook was an experience. I don't know why but whenever i watch wuxian drama's they always end with me crying. Now let's go through these one at a time. If we talk about the story and the plot, i personally think it was great, i mean it had to be if it kept me entertained for 40 hour long episodes. I think the different story lines were well thought out and the way everything unraveled itself was......heartbreaking but it fits the story line i guess. The actors were amazing as always and the music was perfect (whenever literally anything happened and the music started playing, i would start crying). Now lets talk about what i didn't like. "Li Lianhua is going to die, oh wait no he's fine we got a cure...no, no, no he's going to die again we lost the cure, yeah but it's fine we'll find another cure, aaannnnd he's dead.........i think?" Do you understand how stressful this whole dying thing in the series was for me. Everyone betrayed him in some way and now what does he get as sorry, DYING....ALONE!
But i can see why the writer wanted the ending to be open, we could say oh he's alive in OUR version of the ending and he is in peace now. BUT NOOOO, not me in my ending he's dead there's no way he could possibly be alive, it just doesn't make sense. I cant see him as alive and that HUUURRTTS!! That's why i hate open endings, i would just like for the writer or the director to just say he's alive because otherwise in my brain he's just dead.
First it was the Untamed, which by just thinking about it makes me want to cry into my little hole, then it was Guardian, which was bad for me at the time but now i feel like i can handle the ending, will i go back and watch it though......absolutely not. Then it was Killer healer, that series just absolutely DESTROYED my mental health and now it's this. Guys, I'm crying again by just thinking about it.
I read some reviews that said in the novel he lives, but i can't find the novel so i can't give myself that comfort.
But at the end of the day i think the show was really good and if you liked the untamed or killer healer, word of honor, really any of those, you should watch (grab your tissues though).

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