Why Do Women Love BL? Discuss Your Reasons

 Vals Stor:

@Maggi64

Your last 2 lines were exactly my point: 

 "I think the other commenter thought we were only including the US in our comments, cuz some people tend to think the US is the center of the world, lol."

We were discussing the US because we're both American, not because we think the US is the center of the world. If that were the case, we wouldn't be discussing Asian BL, we'd be watching American LGBTQ+ media. I have no idea about local conditions in France, so I'm not qualified to comment. I do, however, know which areas of the USA are gay safe and which aren't. I just got a recruitment call for a high-level corporate job at Walmart, but there's no chance in hell I'm moving to Bentonville, Arkansas.

I love a thought-provoking, substantive discussion like this! It's fascinating to read everyone's opinions and various reasons for liking BL. After reading through this topic I feel compelled to put my two cents in.
Reason 1 - Forbidden fruit
There is a strange appeal in the things we're not allowed to do. First, I have to explain something about myself. I grew up in a conservative family in a pretty conservative country. In other words, I grew up in a world, where everyone was considered heterosexual and LGBTQ+ people were non-existent or invisible at best. I was 16 when I finally got my own PC connected to the Internet. I wanted to practice languages, so I started watching British and German soap operas. To my surprise, there were LGBT characters, who were presented as normal people and not some deviants. That was an eye-opening experience and it made me curious about LGBTQ+ content in media. Of course, I could only watch it in secret, because if my family found out... I would be in trouble. A year later I discovered Asian dramas and so I started watching BL films (dramas have not yet existed). That's how BLs became my dirty little secret ;)
I wonder if that might be a reason why so many women in Asia like BL? Because being a fujoshi is still frowned upon, secretly being one can be quite thrilling, don't you think?
Reason 2 - Sense of belonging
Times were different when I started watching dramas. It was such an unusual hobby, that I was seen as a weirdo. It was hard to find anyone interested in anything Asian, so when I met my now best friend we instantly clicked, even though she was keen on manga & anime, while I was more into kpop & dramas. We shared our interests with each other and that's how I found out she's a yaoist. She introduced me to my two other friends, one of which is a slash shipper and fanfic writer. You could say we were all interested in LGBT-related content, so it pulled me even more into BL (I made them watch some with me). To be among friends with similar interests who would not judge me nor condemn me - this feeling can't be compared to any other, incredibly liberating. Extra reason - we always have a topic for discussion, since my bestie reads mangas on which BL dramas I'm watching are based on.
I realise not everyone is this lucky to have such amazing friends in real life, but among younger generation, with the Internet being easily accessible and BL becoming more and more popular, it's not hard to find other BL fans and become a part of the fandom. After all, sharing similar interests unites people and makes them grow closer.
Reason 3 - Heterosexual?
When me and my friends formed our little "fujoshi" group we were four straight girls. Over ten years have passed and now only half of us declare themselves a heterosexual woman. We were either brainwashed by BL or it made us open our eyes to other possibilities than being heterosexual by default.
This made me think about what jpny01 wrote about this one research: "Sinophone audiences are overwhelmingly straight and female, whereas Anglophone audiences contain men and are much more diverse in gender identification". I'm doubtful whether these Asian women are as straight as they think. I feel that growing up in traditionalist families  in a conservative society makes one discover their sexuality late or makes them deny it (especially if they're bisexual).
Reason 4 - Addiction
As my friend said "Once you step in, you will never find a way out". Well, I find dramas in general to be addictive and BLs are no exception. In my case there is an extra factor - I have been there from the beginning. I've seen the companies "testing the waters", I've seen the very first BL drama, I've watched the genre develop and change with time. To be able to witness this growth feels quite special and I can't help, but support BL productions (so I keep on watching).
I also agree with reasons 1, 4 and 5 provided by Maggi64. Although the fifth one doesn't always apply. There are still a lot of dramas set in high school or university, so it would be awkward to feel attracted to these young boys. I really long for more BL dramas with mature men like "Old Fashioned Cupcake" or "What Did You Eat Yesterday?". With each passing year I care less and less about their looks and more and more about engaging storyline.
These are the main reasons why I watch BL. There are still many tropes that make me frustrated and are bad for my health, yet I just can't seem to stop watching BL. It's an addiction, I swear...

I'd say the trope "I'm straight and only gay for you" is dying out. Often the characters don't talk about their sexuality openly, so we, as viewers, may assume they're bi. Also, it seems to me that more and more characters are becoming open about their sexuality. Off the top of my head, Payu in Love in the Air said he was bi, Seeiw in My Only 12% said he was gay and I could probably find a few more examples.

Femininity in BL is interesting topic. If I see an effeminate man in BL they're usually there for comedic purpose. Plus I doubt an effeminate seme would sell well, so I don't think we'll ever see one in BL.

 ZhouYanRan:

@jpny01
I like your explanation about The West. I just wonder what do you consider as western Europe? Do countries like Poland, Slovakia, Hungary count as The West?

@Maggi64
You wrote "I hate when a BL shoves a girlfriend in our face. It makes it far less believable that the guy is bi." and I understand your point of view and that this is how it makes you feel, but please, allow me to disagree. Having a girlfriend doesn't make a bi man straight, just like having a boyfriend doesn't make him gay. A bisexual is a bisexual (at least in my book). I've seen too many times people applauding a bisexual for having same-sex relationships, while disregarding their opposite-sex relationships or vice versa. I think all relationships should be equally respected.
May I also add - you really remind me of my English literature professor from uni. She was an elderly woman, but very open-minded and she recommended us films like "Maurice" or "My beautiful laundrette". She was really cool :)

Well, I might be considered an "elderly woman" by some because I am 55, lol.   In fact, I was in college in the late 80's  when  "Maurice" and "My Beautiful Laundrette" first came out.  I LOVE both those films!  Most people in the BL fandom were not even born yet until the 90's.

As for "the girlfriend shoved in our faces," I just wish that BL's would acknowledge that a guy who has a girlfriend and then falls for a man actually is bisexual. But, as jpny01 said, we almost never hear the word "bisexual" in BL's.  Instead, it's always, "I'm really straight, but just gay for you."  I think the presence of the girlfriend in such shows is to nail home the "really straight" aspect.   

There are some exceptions, of course.  I never saw the one jpny01 cited, but "The End of the World With You," had a character who openly identified himself with the word "bisexual." And the show portrayed him having both girl and boy sexual partners.  But I really cannot think of that many other BL's that identify a character as bisexual.   

@Maggie64 I'm right there with you at 55. My Beautiful Laundrette was so huge at the time because it was the first time that the leads were gay without it being a movie about being gay - they just happened to be. I saw Maurice with a professor who was English and went to Cambridge and basically lived Maurice - that's a film that hit hard. When he was in school, he was actually friends with E M Forster and used to go to his place with a stack of records and listen to Wagner together. I asked if that was a Euphemism and got a spanking for it. The use of Allegri's Miserere in that scene where they were sitting in Maurice's room was spectacular and perfect.

Older guys used to joke about Maurice and Scudder, "I give them two months at best", which is probably a realistic estimate, but of course we all imagine they lived happily ever after. 

A lot of BL couples are not very good long-term prospects. Nhai might be cute now, but eventually Ai will strangle him.

I was so in love with Freddie (Rupert Graves) and his floppy hair. Sad about Julian Sands.

Without reading every post,  I can tell you why I and my BF watch BL and enjoy it.  

1)  it tends to be a little steamier than the average K drama or C drama

2)  we like Asian BL not European or any other, as we like the smooth, coffee cream skin  and Black hair

3)  we like the  "Romance"  and that as others have mentioned in the few posts I read,  they are usually relatively equal.  

4)  there is something about two rather beautiful men kissing and skinship

 AthenaTheStorierX:

gay guys won't watch BL

Thank you for speaking up for us, gay men.  :)